oh boy, what to say?

For ages I've been trying and failing (and therefore deleting before publishing) to write a post on the whole man/woman communication/role deal... 'cos it is a deal - especially in this weird world of theological college, where there's a maximum of 1/3 of the students being female - a bit of an anomaly in my experience of life (my uni days was in a place where trainee teachers and occupational therapists ruled, and therefore there were loads more women there) ...

having been brought up in a 'post-feminist' environment, it's taken me a while to learn that actually there are differences between men and women that do matter (this lack of recognition of the difference as a child for example, meant that it never occurred to me that the adverts for the army didn't directly apply for me). Whether they should or not is really a different deal, but that's the way things are. And it's taken me a while to take and own the good things within 'traditional' feminine identity - not everything, but I think I hadn't been encouraged to take on some of the positive stuff of being a woman.

Of course being a woman in a traditionally male environment highlights this whole identity thing in a very particular way - despite my belief that the Bible does allow space for women to be leaders, it doesn't particularly help in providing models, and neither does much of the current church scene (traditional or emerging). I'm still not sure, and perhaps this is a dangerous thing to say, that there isn't some space for difference in the perceived priority of roles in which men and women lead and serve the church (i.e. that there are areas where men more usually take the lead) ... or maybe that's just because it's emotionally and culturally appropriate at the moment? I dunno, I really don't know what I'm talking about, I'm just trying to feel my way to the bottom of what the questions should be, nevermind the answers!

... and before you ask 1 sermon and 1 essay down, with a talk and 3 essays to go (I think the talk is written, now I just have to deliver it!) so things are looking up... tho i still wouldn't mind that extra day that Ande (see comments below) has been interceding for! And hi to Jen - I'm glad you like my 'blog... where's yours?!

tara for now;)

overloaded!!

Well, I keep thinking that I'll wait 'till I have something profound to post (it's not good reading too many blogs by people who are naturally articulate and thought-through - raises the bar way too high!) but actually that's never going to happen...

so instead I just want to say that THERE ARE NOT ENOUGH HOURS IN THE DAY!! (recover composure after embarrassing and unnecessary outburst) but really there aren't - this term at Wycliffe has been really fun, I've hung out with lots of nice people, been much more sociable than I was able to be last year. But as we approach the last 2 weeks of term I seem to have an all age sermon to give on Sunday (on being ready for the Second Coming as well...), an Alpha talk on 'how God guides us' to a bunch of sixth formers on Wednesday, and 4 essays to do.
How did that happen??!!

So actually I'm hoping for the Second Coming sooner rather than later! ... Although if I think about that a bit harder, perhaps not, I'm not sure that I am ready...

but if I'm even more silent than usual you'll know why, although blogging may become the next in a long line of procrastination techniques... watch this space (or not!)

an addition to my argument below... I think I nicked this off Jonny Baker's blog (see my random links list)

My heart cracks...

man, I haven't felt this stirred up about politics in a long time... and it's not even my own country - George W. winning over there is kinda what I expected, and to be frank I'm not sure how much good Kerry could have done... I guess we might have had a President (and as much as I'd like to think that the President of the US is just their business, it's not - they are the only superpower, and it affects us all) who didn't come across as so self-righteous and blind to other people's opinions and interests.

However the US has sucked us all in to such a mess in Iraq, the environment is getting more and more screwed up and yet there's no sign of anybody really seriously putting long term self interest before short term profit, the poor get poorer and the rich more screwed up... what can any one person, even the President of US really change, in any major way, about any of that?

What really breaks my heart tho' is what a massive divide this election has shown up, and there doesn't seem to be anyway of talking across it - both sides are so convinced they are right, that they are on the side of good and the other side are short sighted ignorant so-and-so's that there's no way of things changing. This is especially painful in the Christian world where 'evangelicals' in this country would also include in their major concerns the environment, justice for the poor and so on... whereas American 'evangelicals' seem obsessed with personal moral issues (which are, in my opinion, much more difficult to ask civil legislation to rule on) such as abortion, gay marriage and so on, over and above everything else - this includes American friends who live here - I find it so hard to talk to them about it, cos we don't even seem to be talking the same language!

I was going to say more, but I'm not sure I trust myself not to splutter with incoherent, misdirected rage at the way the world seems to be going...

Lord have mercy on us all!